Published on June 6th, 2014 | by markus
Reunion in families
“Absence makes the heart go fonder”, so the wisdom goes.
(Meaning: The lack of something increases the desire for it.)
or do we need to add? “it can make the heart go fonder…
… or give room to wander?”
The unity of the family is often either taken for granted or doesn’t exist.
Therefore it so happens that we forget to appreciate and sometimes even celebrate that we have each other. We loose out of sight that in a family we can rely on its unconditional love and support.
Or in the case that we never experienced the love of the family to that extend, we have become lone rangers, fighting with our elbows out there in the jungle for survival without a team to cheer you on and finally become hard on the way. Our understanding of love is then very limited to what a person can bring benefit to you or what someone can offer you to bring you one step further.
Rediscovering the strength of a family unit is what today is all about. We already spent to much time hurting each other and seeking our own. Now is the time to rediscover the strength to stand together. Nowhere else is a bond possible as the bond of the blood. we can try to imitate it and copy it but will never quite measure up to what family life can offer.
So, it’s time to make a first step, to come out of the trenches, to forget what lies behind and to forgive. The challenges that we face in families remind me of the family of two twin brothers, Jacob and Esau. The grew up in less that ideal family circumstances but in the end found a way to forgive. If you want to read about their challenges, turn to Gen 32/33 or read a summary here:
Back to our opening statement. I think for “Absence…” to make us stronger, we need to have a foundation of a commitment as we can find in families, with married couples or in strong friendships. A reader in yahoo comments on that opening statement: ” In such a case, the heart isn’t “wandering” because it already feels it’s found what it needs. But if the relationship is shaky, new, or just not that stable and serious yet… absence can give the mind too much time to come up with doubts. Any doubt that was already there before the absence will just compound over and over again, creating the opportunity for infidelity, unfaithfulness and breaking up. Also, absence for an unconfirmed amount of time can be death to a relationship. The heart doesn’t know what to hope for and look towards. There’s too much uncertainty.”
A moving youtube Video shows the moving tale of a mother elephant being reunited to her baby. It shows to me that we must never give up on the dream of coming together, standing together, making a new start in our relationships.
(The cover pic is from Dutch-born artist Yona Verwer)